Has anyone else wondered where the "True Dad Confessions" website went?

You know...the site where all of them men went to talk about their wives loose vaginas, how sucktastic parenthood is, how traumatized they are after seeing their wives give birth, etc.

What happened to that site???

True Mom Confessions is still up, but the Dad confessions have vanished completely!

The non-cynical side of me wants to believe that since these sites were originated by women, they possibly decided to re-focus their confession oriented websites toward their intended target audience- women.

The cynical side of me (which admittedly is larger than the non-cynical side), thinks the Dad confessions brought unwelcome truths into the lives of mothers and the site was taken down either as a punishment for what the men were posting or as a way to assuage the stress of moms who frequented the site.

I mean, as a CF person who observes mothers and has read my fare share of mommy crap on the internet, I realize that denial and avoidance is a HUGE part of life for many mothers. Denying that you might hate your kids and parenthood...denying that your husband liked you better before you had rugrats...denying you wouldn't go back and make different choices...avoiding and denying the fact that you probably were better off before you had a kid...etc..

Lots of denial and avoidance in mommyhood from what I see.

So they've accumulated all these things to deny and avoid and some bunch of bitter, yet truthful men come along and ruin everything with their damned confessions!

I mean, it's probably really hard to tell yourself and other women that "your vagina goes right back to normal after birth, I SWEAR!!" and then read a bunch of men (who've actually BEEN INSIDE A VAGINA AFTER BIRTH) say otherwise.

It's probably also hard to admit to yourself that letting your man witness your baby being expelled from your vag might not have been a "bonding experience" at all, but more like a traumatizing one which has rendered him with a bad case of erectile dysfunction.

These are harsh realizations and I just bet that seeing them in print from men who could have very well been their mates, caused the untimely demise of the True Dad Confessions.

What say you guys?

Do any of you recall the woman who gave birth to twins AT AGE 66, via in vitro?

Well, less than three years later, she's dead and her two-year-old twins are orphans.

This is a woman who:

*Lied to the fertility clinic about her age

*Used the fancy logic that since her mother lived to see 101, she might have a snowball's chance in hell of doing the same

*Sold her house to raise $59,000 to pay for the in vitro fertilization

*Advocated for women to "become a mother at the right time for them"

UGH. If "the right time for them" is 66 years old, they're an asshole and no child deserves that as a parent.

That's the thing about parenthood. The timing and conditions should be right for the prospective CHILD also. Not just the parent!

Imagine how much this woman planned this decision. She sold her fucking house for chrissakes. It baffles me that all of this thought went into how she could fulfill HER DESIRE, while seemingly little went into the welfare of her potential offspring. Forget that as humans, we are designed to deteriorate in every way imaginable once we advance into old age. She simply figured, "well my mother lived to see 100, maybe I can too" and that appeared to be the end of her thought process.

Yet another case of children having to suffer consequences of the horrid decisions made by their selfish, breeder parents.

Selfishness is a funny thing...when it relates to someone without kids, I could give a flying fuck.

When it relates to people bringing offspring into the world under circumstances like this, I am disgusted beyond belief.

It pissed me off when this was going down a few years ago and people were saying "well you can't PLAN for everything in life", in defense of this woman's self-centered decision.

That is truly breeder thinking right there.

OF COURSE you can't "plan" for everything. But you can use LOGIC instead of "winging it", which is what so many assholes in the world seem to advocate. Have a baby when you feel like it and just HOPE things work out. We hear that a lot don't we? Sure, that may be great FOR YOU, but what about your children? What will they have to endure as a result of you "chasing your desire"? Do you care?

It appears for this lady and the millions of other people who breed with only THEMSELVES in mind, the answer is no.

A few months ago, I wrote about how my very best friend in the universe is with child. Actually, I wrote about it twice.

Well, I figured I'd post a follow up since her baby shower was a few weeks ago and reality REALLY sunk in for me that yikes, this baby is coming in 3 months.

First, let me discuss the shower.

Like most CF people, I LOATHE FUCKING BABY SHOWERS.

I usually only go to baby showers for the free cake. There's never any alcohol and the rest of what goes on at these things is a deplorable exercise in stupidity.

I mean just the idea of a "baby shower" is annoying to me...this is a widely celebrated custom in American society and that puzzles me.

Have sex, get pregnant, and get a party thrown for you with tons of complementary gifts as a congratulations!

Ummm...do you know how much sex I've had in my lifetime? A whole helluva lot. And none of it has ever resulted in me getting pregnant. Is that not sort of remarkable? WHERE IS MY PARTY? Why don't I get a congratulatory celebration?

What kind of paganism is this country founded on for fuck's sake?

Anyway, back to my hatred of baby showers...the biggest insult to my sensibilities?

The fucking stupid ass baby shower games.

Such as:

*Guess the pregnant lady's belly size by cutting up pieces of string and seeing which is the best fit for her "circumference". The winner who comes closest gets a prize OMG! EXCITING!

Laaaaame!

*Smashing up candy bars in diapers (to look like baby feces, awww how charming!!!), and then using sight and smell to try and guess WHICH candy bar is in which diaper. Pseudo shit mashed up in diapers = OODLES OF FUN!

*Pin the baby on the pregnant woman...sort of like pin the tail on the donkey but done with paper babies. Everyone is blindfolded and the person who puts the baby closest to the knocked up chick's stomach WINS!

Ughhhhh.

Get the hell out of here with this dumb shit.

So, suffice it to say I was incredibly relieved when BFF told me we would not be engaging in any of this fuckery at her shower. We were going to eat good food, socialize with friends, have cake, open her gifts and then roll the fuck out.

I could even consume liquor!

Since BFF was flying out from Cali, where she now lives, she asked that her guests only gift her with baby clothing and gift cards, since these things could be easily transported on the plane.

Now, I think she expected that I'd just get her a gift card and call it a day. After all, I am far from a "kid person" (hello...UNDERSTATEMENT) and the thought of me actually shopping for baby shit was not something that ever crossed her mind.

Well, for some reason that made me want to defy her expectations and go buy baby clothes.

As you can guess, it was sort of a debacle. I was totally clueless and out of my element.

My primary concern? WHY is this crap is so expensive? It's clothes for a baby. They grow out of this shit in two weeks, why does it cost so fucking much?

What a ripoff.

*sidenote* After I discovered how expensive baby clothes are, I told BFF that once the kid is born, she should just keep it diapered and wrapped in blankets and beach towels. That will save a fuckton of cash. Forget buying loads and loads of expensive, cutesy outfits that are not going to fit the kid 6 days from the day it was purchased. Where does this baby need to be every day? It's not like it has school or a job to go to! It's not going to have to keep up appearances or anything! So why does it need a bunch of outfits? Diaper it's ass, throw some socks on it's feet, wrap it in a blanket and handle your business!

BFF laughed me off and while she didn't exactly thank me for this advice, I figure she'll be grateful I gave her this idea in a few months and simply concluded my stellar advice with a charitable "and you're welcome."

As I further flipped through the racks of overly tiny, overly cutesy baby clothes at Target, I grew more and more frustrated with the stupid fucking code language they label this shit with.

For instance, certain clothes had a "PR" label...

"What the fuck is PR???", I asked myself out loud.

Puerto Rico?

Public Relations?

Punk Rock?

Then there was the baby shit labeled "NB".

Um....

New Balance?

Not Big?

Nagging Baby?

UGH! I am used to reading tags that say S, M, L, XL, etc.!

My brain does not compute any of this. Am I an airhead or is this whole process just stupid?

Possibly both?

Apparently, my befuddlement was showing because a Target sales girl came over to me asking if I needed help.

I wonder what gave her that idea! Could it have been me saying "Goddamn it all to hell!", semi-loudly while drowning in a sea of baby clothes?

Anyhow, she kindly took the time to educate me that "PR" stands for "Preemie" and "NB" stands for "Newborn".

Well, slap me with a big fat fucktard sign.

God I suck at this baby shopping shit. Note to self- NEVER DO IT AGAIN. Next time, get a gift card and quit trying to prove yourself.

I then asked her to show me where the "oneso's" were, totally forgetting the term is "onesie".

TB (Target Bitch), laughed hysterically as if I was intentionally making a joke.

Could I BE a bigger douchebag right now?

I think not.

Will I be baby shopping ever again in this lifetime?

You can bet your ass the answer is hell goddamn no.